F*&!@ its the Fourth!

Ok so it’s been over six weeks since I’ve had any time or any thing to blog (you decide which is more likely). And here we are more than four weeks into the summer with the Fourth of July just around the corner. Which means only one thing - summer is half over. Which in itself means several (all equally depressing things): 1. I have just over six weeks to complete my summer to-do list 2. In less than two months I’ll have to start imposing bath time, and bed time, and no t.v. time and all the things that make the rest of the time I want to be a really bitchy hard-ass mom seem so much less impressive and therefore less effective 3. I have even less time until I have to figure out exactly when things like Little Gym and Kindermusik, and Fall soccer, and oh yeah, school start again 4. And most important, I have only half as much time as I did before to make this the MOST FABULOUS SUMMER EVER! This might sound crazy (if you’re a man, or if you are not in charge of raising children, or if you have no standards pertaining to childhood and nostalgia) but it’s not. I can say with authority that most women in my position would agree that the Fourth of July means much more than fireworks; it means time lost, and missed opportunities, and panic attacks, and the incredible, overwhelming pressure of being the best possible parent (make that mother) you can be by giving your children the one thing every child treasures - SUMMER! Now I know that sounds pretty intense and maybe even a little implausible, but just think for a minute, what are the best memories of your childhood? Take the top ten and for the most part they fall into one of two categories - they are either Christmas memories or Summer memories. And its a lot harder to make good memories when you don’t have a fat man with a shitload of presents to make the magic for you. So I’m not making this up, the pressure to give your children a fantastic summer is undeniable and when you hit the end of June, no matter how well things are going, you can’t help taking a look at what you’ve done with your kids and only seeing what you haven’t done.