Saturday, January 17, 2009

Coming Clean

In the spirit of new beginnings, fresh starts etc., I am taking this opportunity to admit to the following (in no particular order):

1. I sometimes forget to feed my children breakfast. More often than not they are well fed and I always feed them on school days. But now and again, I'll find myself at 11 am on a Saturday wondering why the hell those three are so cranky.
2. Noggin is my nanny.
3. I subscribe to US Weekly. I also subscribe to Atlantic Monthly. I read every US Weekly cover to cover, I read the cover of Atlantic Monthly.
4. I can sing the Hanna Montana theme song.
5. Last week, I didn't get dressed until Friday (I did however potty-train one toddler, do 14 loads of laundry, clean a bathroom, feed my children roughly 3 meals each day, finish one article, play calico critters and puppy in my pocket, and load and empty the dishwasher no less than 25 times.)
6. I sometimes pretend I can't do things just so my kids won't ask me to do them. For example, my children believe I have no idea how to hook the wii up to the tv. Its a shame how long it took me to realize the power of playing dumb.
7. Once I let my stove stay broken for three weeks so I didn't have to cook.
8. If you have a new baby, I'm totally faking it when I offer to hold your baby (and if your kids are older, I probably don't like them either).
9. I don't care about the environment as much as I seem to, I'd just rather spend my money on a new anthro sweater than paper towels.
10. I buy Gap jeans because they run big and I can pretend I'm a size six and not an eight.
11. I "ran into" my college boyfriend on facebook and he pretended he didn't know me.
12. I am one of the people who will over analyze your Christmas card.
13. I actually think Kathy Griffin is pretty funny.

1 comment:

rachel... said...

Okay, I promise I'm not stalking you, but seriously, I love your blog. LOVE it.

And I love this post. Just in case it makes you feel any better:

1. I don't forget so much as let them fend for themselves sometimes on Saturdays.

2. Mine, too. *blush*

3. I have no subscriptions. I don't remember the last book I read it was so long ago. But I read a hundred blogs a day. Okay, maybe exaggerating... a little...

4. I can sing iCarly, Drake & Josh, and dozens of other themes to children's tv programs.

5. I had a similar week, minus all the laundry. I only did a few loads, which are still sitting in baskets.

6. Aha! Thanks for the tip!

7. Another tip!!! See why I love this blog?? Break the stove!!! Brilliant!

8. Okay, not me. I totally am NOT faking wanting to hold your new baby. I LOVE holding your new baby, and, in fact, I am plotting to kidnap your new baby.

9. I care about the environment, but only at my own convenience. I probably woudldn't bother recycling if it didn't save me a ton on garbage bags and they pick up the bins right at our curb.

10. Holy crap! I've got to start shopping at the Gap!

11. All of my old boyfriends have reluctantly accepted my facebook friend requests, then categorically ignored me.

12. I collect Christmas cards as a way to deal with my social insecurities. LOL

13. I love Kathy Griffin. There is no "pretty funny" about it for me. I want to BE Kathy Griffin.

Okay... I'm just waiting for you to block me from following your blog. I swear I'm harmless. :)

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